I am reading esoteric manifestos by Spanish poets when the course I am preparing is just the survey and there is no need … but really, I am managing PTSD by making my subject as interesting as possible to myself, and as real.
I have just found a good PTSD screening tool. It is for veterans but if you substitute “academic” for “military” then it makes perfect sense. My machine-graded result says:
“Your screen results are consistent with many of the symptoms of PTSD. You are advised to see your physician or a qualified mental health professional immediately for a complete assessment….“
This is very nice, although I would have to find a professional who would both believe me and have expertise in this area and be able to accept the idea of that women can be in research fields and not just technical ones. That is much easier said than done, as I already know.
Still, it is quite interesting to take this assessment and get such clear results. I have always felt and also been told it was self-indulgent to say one had PTSD. Yet if the description fits so easily, why reject it? Especially since that means one can address it? Why is it more ethical to try to say the problem is something less likely?
Axé.
coldhearted scientist وداد 