I am told to remember that they feel ENTITLEMENT and they want POWER and CONTROL. I am to follow my INSTINCTS about them and keep very strong BOUNDARIES. There are people whose interest is obstruction only. Axé.
My 23d year in this house and at last I have a desk that really is the right height. I feel completely different. Completely. I also have a solid kitchen floor, after 23 years. There are only a few more things to do and the house will be quite comfortable. I have new tires and … More Things
This is an exact description of what happened to me with my ill-fated Vallejo book. Its ill fate killed me and it took me a long time — seven years, I believe — to understand. If I had understood it then I could have worked on or with the situation. But I did not understand … More Pérez Firmat
This group is a non-profit but it depends upon the work of one member who thinks of that work as a way to live. They would like salary, and they have referred to us as a business. They are already getting reimbursed for mileage at the IRS business, not charity rate because they wanted to … More Why
On the concept of “feeling heard,” that I always mock. I do not ask of entities like the university that they merely hear me, I want them to actually do things (like hire on the tenure track). Being heard is nothing, I always say I want action.HOWEVER. What I always did want was to be … More Je te vois
These things are related to each other in the way that the Gothic is related to abuse, but the reason I have been thinking about both today is coincidental. I should read this book, I do not feel magical realism is a useful or interesting category but it appears others still do. On the harassment: … More Harassment and magical realism
I found these notes from long ago, before I started this blog, about abusive parents. It seems like another world now, but it explains some things. 1/ Parents and money. How did I/will I/would I feel when I/if I accepted financial help? Answer: murdered/nonexistent. 2/ They cannot handle emotions. Any adverse emotion leads them directly … More Notes from the past
I went to get that book from the library and it was there, along with two books of interest I had heard of and one I had not, so I checked out all four. It was amazing. This paper is not in my field, but in a field the university supports, and I feel like … More Support
I have some unfashionable views about gender, which I do not believe is entirely performative or entirely about identification. As a woman I cannot just say I want to be seen as a man and be seen as one. It’s very difficult to do and not all of those who try, succeed. I am still … More About passing, things you can’t say
This old post by Slaves of Academe is important on the promotion of vapid faculty but is he right, still, about the regional or urban working-class university? What does it mean when even these are market universities? I did not fully understand Readings’ book back then, and I should read it now. I was sure … More Fine Young Cannibals
