I like to get up and start writing down the interesting thoughts I have during the night, but this seems to depend upon being back home, or somewhere homelike. Here I like to see the light break but I am then always struggling against anxiety, pain, grief, how did I get here, how can I get away from here, how did I fall prey to those who would have me throw my life away? These are the things I think before dawn.
It is not what they do to you; it is what they can get you to do to yourself. It is difficult to live so far away from your kind. I am starting to think serious time away this summer is a mental health necessity.
So I am going to start writing ill-humored posts early in the morning, to get these things off my mind, as opposed to read news and magazines until they pass.
Axé.
coldhearted scientist وداد 