coldhearted scientist وداد

I read about all these professors and how happy they are, how independent and financially secure and creative, and I think:

• • I should be happy and productive, and it is only my lack of strength that prevents it
  • They are happy in places even sadder than here; I should be too
  • I am lazy and not working hard enough
  • What is it in my history that caused me to remain so impaired?
  • What would I like to do with my life?
  • What would I have done with my life had I not been so beaten down from the beginning?
  • How can I right this ship?

and so on, and feel practically too weak to get up. Then it occurred to me to say instead “We are working a demanding job in difficult circumstances. We got here through life’s vicissitudes, and we have certain pleasures and certain power,” and I felt much better.

Before Reeducation I did not scrutinize my life for imperfection and I lived a much more perfect life therefore.

Axé.