So again, it is: their political problem is not my psychological problem, or should not be. And it is political.
Also: the psychological problems they have created with their politics are not my responsibility to solve. For instance, if they have made someone feel awful, I do not have to become a sacrificial victim to that person – even if it is convenient to everyone.
Their political problems make our working conditions untenable.
The fact that I survived that is amazing.
I don’t think I can overcome this fully, I think I need to take care of myself and also be very aware of how evil these people are.
And I have to guard against every form of self-disparagement, every “should,” do as I see fit.
And take care of myself.
And realize not everyone in town is terrible. I just really have to step around the Cajun elites, they are too dangerous for me now … I think. (We’ll see how it seems when I feel better.)
Axé.
coldhearted scientist وداد 