Yesterday was Candlemas and I could hear the air grow warm and thick and fill with twangling sounds, as it does when the ice melts and we turn toward spring. I was tempted to write a short poem about it but I believe this is beyond my current powers.
I have been thinking of hiring a career coach to help me stay on track for landing an academic job of the kind I would like. People have typically told me that landing the right academic job is what is reasonable and sensible, and what I should wait for. I came long ago to the conclusion that this was ideology with very little basis in reality. The truer fact is that it is very rare to land that kind of academic job if you do not do it in the first place. In this landscape, money spent on career coaches is money which could be spent on the LSAT and application fees to law schools.
Law is in fact the only career idea I have ever had. I have other academic and cultural interests, yes, and I have a job and a career, yes. Law is however by far the clearest career idea I have had, and as I conceive of what I would do with it, it incorporates all of my other academic and cultural interests better than any other. Yes, the right academic job would do it as well, but it is simply false that all academic jobs are the same. And what I am interested in, which includes but is not limited to non-faux research, professionalism, being part of a competent team, having a direct impact on policy, is simply not what one can expect from anything but the very best academic jobs; and academia is too narrow. I have tried to believe those who have explained to me that all work is acute suffering anyway, and you do it only to survive. I think that may actually be a fantasy of the idle rich who do not expect to work at all.
Reasons I have not gone to law school yet are:
+ I never got into the really good programs which have everything I am looking for plus loan forgiveness, and my less than stellar LSAT score is the reason.
+ Without loan forgiveness it is an enormous expense. Due to my lack of savings and extant financial obligations, I never figured out how I could swing it without (or maybe even with) contracting crippling debt.
+ I could go, even part-time, with in-state tuition here and afford it, but I am not convinced the affordable local programs would really get me where I want to go. I’d get a J.D. and pass the bar, sure, but I want the right programs, the right seminars, the right clinics and connections for a broad, but still fairly specific interest in policy matters.
+ A less key, but still influential reason was that the idea of my going to law school seemed to terrify my parents, and I felt very guilty about it. I have since decided I cannot be ruled by that. (It was about halfway to tenure that I first got the idea, and in retrospect I think I should have done it then and not told anyone, so as not to get any flak!)
However:
+ There are programs that have everything I want, such as the one at UT-Austin, that I do think I have a fighting chance of getting into, and there are programs that have almost everything I want, such as the one at the University of New Mexico, which I am sure I can get into.
+ These programs, like all programs, cost real money but perhaps there is a financial angle I could work that I have not yet. Perhaps it is not as bad as I think, and I can worry about the loans later.
Now it is time to dispel the reasons I have been given by others not to do it:
+ I am a woman over 40, I might never get a job. I really doubt that, it doesn’t apply to me.
+ If I take loans and cannot pay on them, the Federal government will force my retired parents to pay on them, and they could lose their house. That is utterly delusional.
+ I am very good at my current business, and I went into it because I wanted to. I should therefore grab onto it yet more tightly. That makes no sense if I feel impelled to change, which I do.
+ It took time and effort to get where I am, I should not be flighty and jump off into something else. Even if that made sense at some point, a great deal of time has passed since: it is not as though I have not given this a chance.
+ Lawyers only want to make money, and nobody should want to be that crass. People who say this are speaking from prejudice and misinformation: they imagine I am interested in corporate law, they are not aware of my interests, and they have no idea of the kind of jobs one can do.
Now we will begin to list reasons to do it:
+ I have wanted to for 15 years and I have not changed my mind.
+ What I do now is too narrow and constraining.
+ I am still waiting for my current career to become interesting and it has not happened yet.
+ When I think about actually going to law school my energy levels and degree of mental acuity jump over 100%.
+ Professional degrees are a good thing to have.
+ One could work in a variety of urban locations.
+ I want to work in a professional setting with a professional team.
+ I always wanted to be a research professional in a field with a direct impact on social policy.
We will see.
Axé.
coldhearted scientist وداد 
Join the United Nations and focus on international law concerning the prevention of genocide.
It sounds to me like your decision is already made, and that you are talking about law school for all the right reasons. If you want to have an IMPACT, that is definitely the place to be.
O good! You see – people on the Internet are more objective than people in real life.
I just discussed this on the phone with my brother in New Jersey. He said, you need to get out of Louisiana, why don’t you sign on at Rutgers? I said, it doesn’t work quite that way. He said, you are being too pessimistic. Think positively and it will. I say: that is New Age B.S. and he does not even have a B.A., what does he know about how academic hiring works and has he not paid attention to my adventures on the job market these 19 years?
So: I’m glad to have your comments!
do it. and when you get into UT law, look me up and we’ll have a drink.
kt
Oh good! 🙂
ps. i remember talking with a professor friend of mine (i used to be in academia myself. still married/partnered with it–nother story…) who mentioned a grant specifically for phds who want to pursue a second terminal degree in an “unrelated” field. i’m sorry i don’t have the specifics on this grant, but i’m sure if you poke around a bit, you’ll figure out what it is i’m talking about. that is, if you aren’t already aware of it already. this professor friend has a phd in eng. lit and was thinking about going to seminary school. or did he want a phd in theology? sorry, the details have slipped my mind, now that i’ve decided to focus on non-“academic” art. best of luck!
Gracias!!! I think the AAUW (?) has a program like that. As I remember it exists but not everybody can have a grant like that. But this is one of the things I need to check out/remember to check out. Plan this whole thing very well, better than I did the other times I applied, and go further with the planning than I did.
I’ve also already gotten nostalgic for my current research projects, the book on race, the digital archive, etc., but I still think: key is to work in a high energy professional atmosphere, which I do not, and that is why I suffer from failure to thrive. Who knows: maybe those projects are projects for retirement, or that I can get someone else to do so that they will exist. Or maybe: finish the race book before law school, do the digital archive when I’m old.
A law degree would inform a book on race and likely give you a new perspective and energy on the topic.
Yes – and I could be in the Latin American Studies Association section on Law and Society. And work on the prison industrial complex in an inter-American frame (for instance).
I have over the years figured most of it out, what I’d do, why I should, I almost don’t need to rehearse it. What has always stopped me primarily is nostalgia for what it *could* have been like to be an academic, and the expense.
Subjectively my neurotic belief was that one had to become a successful, happy academic *first,* to prove personhood, and could *then* but only then move on.
okay, found it:
it’s the mellon “new directions” fellowship. it requires a nomination:
http://www.mellon.org/internet/grant_programs/programs/higher-education-and-scholarship/researchuniversities#current
Thank you!!! I *think* those are for people who are staying at their current jobs but are adding a new disciplinary perspective to their research. And I’ll bet I’m not as competitive for them as I should be. However, I’ll check them out, and anything similar I can find!
My students tell me that the LSAT prep courses are very worthwhile. Also expensive. However the LSAT score seems to be the primary determinant of what tier school you can get into.
And I agree, for anyone who already has a doctorate and the debt or the lack of savings associated with that path needs loan forgiveness. If you pursue a public interest path, this could be realistic.
I have contemplated getting a JD. I don’t know if I could take the cramming, though. On the day I passed the comps for my doctorate I said “that is the last test you are taking ever.” On the other hand, law is a good career for people who like to argue and don’t have a good sense for realizing when they are down in an argument.
Happy New Year! It’s been awhile…
I encourage you to pursue this dream! As a champion of sleepless mulling over the question “What should I do with my life?!”, I find the gut check you’re exhibiting above – somewhat concealed by the rational listmaking of pros and cons re: law school – is quite telling.
I also think that even if you haven’t had this dream for so many years, which is reason enough to pursue this goal, that you are a bright person motivated by a range of interests, and a career switch sounds like a natural fit for you. I think you should go for it – a PhD, JD with as much travel, knowledge and life experience as it seems you have? You’ll be a star!!
Finally, I’ll say, as someone who hopes to graduate in ’09 with the PhD to add to the MBA, I’m counting on the 2 degrees to distinguish me from whatever pack I’m in at this point. Because if we can overcome the prohibitive costs of education, these *credentials* can really work for us in these extremely unequal times. Not that you necc. want to think about it in those terms…
Good Luck!!!!
+ When I think about actually going to law school my energy levels and degree of mental acuity jump over 100%.
Ha! that’s just what happens to me when I am working on historical research. It’s supposed to be nuts to want a Ph.D. in history, but I wrote my senior thesis in the fall and I felt more alive while doing it since I don’t know when! I just want to do that again a bunch of times. I don’t care if I starve and die immediately when I’m done with grad school, it would still be worth it. Being a professor would be nice, but I’m not going to bank on it.
I think you should go to law school and I should go to grad school. 🙂
Human – *definitely* go to grad school, it’s great. I’d do another Ph.D., or more than one, if money were no object. Near Eastern Studies would be one, and Economics another.
Hi Redstar! That’s what I think. I can’t believe, actually, that I haven’t done it already, I have been dissuaded by the fearful. And also the cost, of course which is really daunting. But I think it is true: the people who say it is a bad idea don’t really know who they’re talking to.
Servetus – I’ve taken an LSAT prep course. Some people in it were spending 30 hours a week on it, but I was in a 60 hour a week job. Guess which people got more out of it. The actual class was really bad (it was a Kaplan course); what was good was all the practice materials they had available and opportunities to take practice test in realtime environments. But the people who took the greatest advantage of that were sons of corporate lawyers whose fathers were funding them to do only that for an entire quarter.
I am not sure I’ll ever be in a position to have a really good LSAT score, although this is one of the attitudes I may have to change. I actually think a regular university course in formal logic might work as well or better, and it would fit better into my day … HM … but then again: the point is to keep debt down and the cheapest thing by far would be go to LSU, which takes LSATs much lower than mine anyway.
The good news is that there are *many* more schools with loan forgiveness programs now than there were before (although note: Texas-Austin is absent from this list): http://www.abanet.org/lsd/legislation/feb2007/schools.html
Cost of law school is horrible. LSU in state tuition is $11K and that is low. UC system in state is $30K, out of state is $40K. Harvard is also $40K. They figure that a person with a modest lifestyle needs $62K per year, living in a dorm.
You can easily end up with close to $200K, not $100K in loans, and it is hard to *get* those loans because the amounts allowed on federal programs are unrealistically low, many loans have to be private, and those do not qualify for loan forgiveness, from what I can tell, so it is hard to figure out.
LSU claims to have scholarships also.
I am by no means an expert, but my impression is that for the programs the students I am recommending all the time enroll in, the official tuition amount is just a sticker price. Most of them have gotten some kind of rebate. If you can afford to apply it might be interesting just to see what kind of remissions you could get. I think you can also get permission to apply without paying application fees…I took formal logic in college and it’s really paid off in life in general. I’d recommend it just on the basis of “helpful things to know.”
S, that’s interesting. *Both* of the schools I have actually gotten into offered a rebate. LSU talks about it in not very veiled terms right on their website.
I don’t think I can apply without paying the fees – I have a job – but you’re right, it’s worth a try.
Formal logic it is, then. I need to find a decent professor – all the ones teaching it now are rumored by the students (and I believe them) to be horrid. I can see for the fall. 🙂
Your engagement with social issues, commitment to dialogue and theoretical background would make one amazing lawyer/ law professor/ legal theorist/ political writer/ legislator.
I’m just so happy with the hopeful tone here.
Hi Kiita! A) that’s what I think too, arrogant though it may seem; B) O good! 🙂 The whole plan, even if unrealizable due to finances (the LSAT issue can be conquered, I really need to figure out the money) really does sort of pull everything else into shape.
You sound very excited about this–go for it!
Ditto on the hopeful tone. As the days are getting longer, I hope it’s contagious!
I am a lawyer who changed directions in my mid 40’s and obtained an MA in an unrelated field. As I’m currently considering going on for a Ph.d, I thought my “mirror image” perspective might interest you. Do you know anyone who has actually gone to law school? It is a soul-killing experience, particulary for someone who is interested in social change. Clinics and seminars are great, but your main preoccupation during three years of classes will be answering one less than pressing question: “Who gets the money and why?”. If you are lucky enough to find actual legal (as opposed to legal/ academic) work in something related to social justice, you will spend the first seven years doing extremely menial tasks, e.g. organizing endless documents.Your professional environment will likely be filled with competitive people, many of whom will be workaholics and few of whom will have any social skills. It pains me to be so discouraging: perhaps your experience can be very different. Just food for thought, I guess.
“…you will spend the first seven years doing extremely menial tasks, e.g. organizing endless documents. Your professional environment will likely be filled with competitive people, many of whom will be workaholics and few of whom will have any social skills.”
This is academia, though, which I’m already in, and in law I could live in a city. Still it is useful input.
“Who gets the money and why?”
We have to spend a lot of time in academia figuring that out, too, and I am very unsentimental about it, which amazes people.
I’ve got an IRL friend who quit law for academia: she had opted for tax law very young and not liked it, then gotten a research idea in Sociology, went for it. Now she doesn’t have full time work yet but she has had a very interesting series of postdocs, and was a researcher for the W.H.O. for a while in Geneva. She does not favor law school but the other lawyers I know, do – perhaps it is like professors, who say get a Ph.D.! Do academia!
I also say get a Ph.D., though – graduate school is fun and the Ph.D. level is the most fun.
Excitement / hope: there is something about saying five years from now I’ll be doing that, which makes things seem great *now*. It’s like having a deadline, it’s energizing.
I’m also excited very prosaically about the possibility of a job which pays into Social Security – Louisiana and Illinois government jobs, the main ones I’ve had, don’t, so I don’t qualify, and I’d only have to work three years or so to get enough quarters. It’s not urgent but it’s a consideration.
I have thought about going to law school since the 1970’s (when I was neck-deep in the prison movement), so I say go for it, if you’ve a mind to. It’s just one more step on the path of being who you are. Which is a journey not a destination anyway.
It’s the money and my LSAT score. Had those been better up until now, I’d have already gone … with those factors, I’ve got ambivalence … but yes, I got the idea from being in the prison movement. I *think* I’m going to sign up for the June LSAT and be systematic about reviewing for it from 25 May to that point, see how *that* works.
I keep meaning to mention this blog to you: a professor who went to law school.
http://sfrajett.blogspot.com/
Thank you! That’s a great blog. I had actually found it a couple of years ago, when I hadn’t moved law school plans so close to the front burner as now (although my recent PRIZE makes me very academically enthusiastic this month), forgot about it, lost it … she writes *beautifully* and it is very interesting.