“I am sorry I said the wrong thing. I am sorry to have upset you. I hope you can get over it.”
Meaning:
“I refuse to apply normal standards of behavior when dealing with you. I will say abusive and dismissive things, I will ask inappropriate questions, and I will make inappropriate remarks.
“I am unable to see why you object to this treatment. Your failure to believe you deserve it is irrational.”
Axé.
coldhearted scientist وداد 
I went through this for years with a person who I thought was my friend. One day when she was making one of her comments, I told her off. After this happened three or four times, a mean comment and my correction, she stopped with the comments. But then at that point I realized that I did not care about her any more.
I figured it out in that Relationship, in which I was constantly told I was Unreasonable. Now I can spot it instantly!
My (ex?) friend admitted today that she was mean to me for months, and apologized, but still would not tell me why she was angry with me, because she had to go to bed and that was a conversation we should have another time. So now I am left sleepless wondering what I did to her. Like Hattie I am realizing I don’t care about her anymore… or at least don’t want to be friends with her anymore… but I do care about our ten-year friendship, and mourn it, and that is hard.
Profacero, I had a relationship like that once. The best part was how he would make up these “rules” and present them to me as The Way Everyone Handles Their Relationships. If I didn’t like them, of course I was Unreasonable. I was very young and naive enough to believe it all at the time, unfortunately. This guy did me a big favor when he dumped me after a few months.
Jack Spicer!
(Just wanted to say hi! I am on serious – half-year sabbatical so I am not around much these days…nose to the grindstone kinda thing…but Jack Spicer! I’ll take out this stuff today – thanks~~~~)
Wow, you’ve been reading back a ways! Nice to see you! Enjoy your sabbatical!
The thing about “said the wrong thing” is it’s weaselly phrasing. It avoids going so far as to mean ‘I did something wrong/unethical’; it leaves open the construction of ‘I incautiously said something without remembering your personal and unreasonable sensitivities’.
Yes, precisely.