PZ: I am not enjoying our relationship, Whiteman, and I would like certain things to change. WM: I am not willing, Z. PZ: Well then, Whiteman, it is time for me to go. WM: Absolutely not! It is strictly forbidden! The experts have ruled that there must be compromise in relationships. In this case the … More That Endless Whiteman

This conversation took place about five years ago, but I am still slightly amazed by it. WM: Whereas you are in my opinion very good-looking; whereas you are not Catholic and will therefore not have Catholic hangups; whereas you are from California and should therefore be very liberal; and whereas we are friends; I hereby … More Another Type of Whiteman

Whiteman: I would like to exhibit immature behavior in the following four ways, and I would like you to participate. PZ: No. Whiteman: You disappoint me. I thought you were a culture-crosser. I am from another culture, so you should learn from me and do as I say. PZ: Not this time, sorry. Whiteman: But … More And Yet Again, the Whiteman

This is a condensed version of my New Year’s conversation with Da Whiteman. PZ: I have asked this question four times, and not received an answer. I really need an answer, so that I can continue with my job assignment. WM: You have not received an answer because you have not asked often enough. Only … More White Mail

Following is one of the strange dialogues I have had. Whiteman: How are you? PZ: I’m doing well. Whiteman: Any particular reason? PZ: The weather is good, things at work are going well, and I am going to see an interesting film later today. Whiteman: You are being dishonest. PZ: Excuse me? Whiteman: Things are … More Bad Medicine

The Perceptionists have a great album called Black Dialogue, but this dialogue took place with a whiteman. WM: I would like to work with you. Would you like to work with me? PZ: In principle, yes, but what shall we work on? WM: On my project. PZ: I am working on a different project, so … More White Dialogue

From the photograph on my office wall the face of a man from an indigenous Amazonian tribe looks evenly at me. Contemplating this picture, thinking about colonialism, reason, and reasons of state, a very basic perception came to me, with the requisite sense of déjà vu. This time, however, it settled in differently. The most … More Da Whiteman Speak Wit’ Forked Tongue

A. Some Evidence. PZ: Whiteman, I have not heard back from you on my equipment request. Did you receive it? WM: Yes, but I took no action, because you only sent it once. Please send it every day, so I will remember to take care of it. You must learn to behave as the whitemen … More The Sound of One (White) Hand Clapping